Monday, February 14, 2011

Hayward

Well, it has almost been a year since posting on this. I have missed it some, it seems relaxing to post on here...just to get some thoughts out of my head. Also, it is good for me to go back and read some of my old postings. Just to see what was going on in my life and how things have changed. Like right now, I use punctuation and capitalization...like a grown up or something. The changes are much more profound than that, probably...but that is the easiest to notice right away.

Well, if I am posting on here, something significant must have happened. And it did. My close friend and guru of all things emergent church has passed away. Hayward Barnett was almost 85 years old, and he went home to be with the Lord last Sunday evening. Here is his obituary, which he wrote himself. And if you knew him, you can definitely tell that he wrote that himself! It's less of a recount of his life, to me anyway, and more like a, "hey, remember me this way...a gentleman". But I will remember Hayward differently, I will remember him as someone that developed a friendship with me b/c we had so much in common. I mean, he had no family, he was 84 years old and lived by himself in a small apartment, he lived his life out as modestly as possible, no children, never married, took care of his mother his whole life, was a staunch supporter of the southern baptist convention, hated to eat meals outside of his apartment, the list goes on and on with similarities between Hayward and I. lol What we had in common was a passion and a love for seeing things the way they could be...and according to Christ, the way they should be. Hayward kept me accountable to my rhetoric, he was always quick to remind me about the things that I had said I wanted to do. Especially, when he could tell that I was not doing them! Hayward loved the thought of the local church of Jesus Christ changing the world. He thought the Church ought to be more than being about business as usual. He thought the idea of salvation meant something more than just now you do the "right thing" and and go to church all the time and you won't go to hell when you die.

Hayward was progressive in his thoughts, he had a young heart! I loved that about him! He was not cranky and bitter about the cards he had been dealt, he decided, later in life that he was going to pursue Christ, even it meant being uncomfortable and trying something new! At 80-81 years of age, Hayward started listening to contemporary Christian music and attending non-traditional baptist churches. He participated in blogs and forum discussions online, he read modern day theologians and emergent church leaders books, he read everything he could get his hands on! A ton of it, HE DID NOT AGREE WITH, but he didn't dismiss it just because he didn't agree with it! He would consider that their point and agree to disagree and go on to the next topic on which they might agree on.

I will miss him! I will miss our long conversations about such topics. I will miss coffee in the afternoon with Hayward when many times we just sat quietly and watched traffic go by on hwy 65. I will miss his way, his modesty, his gentleman like attitude towards life, his sense of humor and the way he got cracked up about things that I would not have thought twice about. Most of all I will miss him, how close we had become over the past 3 or 4 years and who will fill that void in my life. (selfish, i know...but i don't care) He prayed for me and my family...all the time. He held my feet to the fire when he thought I might have been out of line. He helped to keep my vision in check when I thought it was too easy to just see dollar signs. He was my friend...and I will miss him. Thank you Hayward, for being such a part of my life over the past couple of years!

6 comments:

Fran said...

I know there is no like button on here... but I like this. You did a very nice job here.

dscott said...

thanks Fran

Jill said...

He was a great man indeed. He will be missed. Thanks for posting this.

dena said...

sounds like an amazing man. how did you originally meet him?

Unknown said...

Well said Daniel. I don't know him, but I suspect he is honored by your loving tribute

Gary said...

I am not being judgmental here in any way, so please don't anyone take it that way, but after reading this and knowing Hayward, I asked myself this question: How many other "Haywards" are out there? Sitting alone, hungry to share thoughts, eager to engage, willing to open their lives unconditionally. I'm glad I got to know him just a little! Probably the "biggest" little man I've ever met!