my little boy says things wrong sometimes. one thing he says wrong, and we don't correct him b/c it is too cute, is belax! he means relax, but he says belax. every night at bath time, he says ... daddy, when I get done can I belax?
I am learning again this week why his way of saying it ia probably more right. I have to carve some time out to just BE-LAX. There is a spiritual message in there, I am just too lax to unpack it.
chillin on the beach this week ... later
Sunday, June 1, 2008
Thursday, May 29, 2008
kiddos
i have two of the most unbelievable kids. i get so caught up in the moment sometime that i forget about how different they are. and how i have to learn how to communicate with them differently. they learn differently, they like different things, they respond to discipline differently...it is crazy!!
eric is the oldest, and he is pretty low key. one amazing thing about him is his heart. he always wants to help/befriend the kids who are not the most athletic or the best at whatever it is they are doing. he migrates toward them and says things to me, like...i just wanted them to be in on stuff too dad. how cool is that? he loves video games, the kid would sit in front of the tv playing games all day if i let him. in fact, we have had to limit his play time at that. he gets to play video games on mon, wed, fri and sat.
kinley on the other hand is the comedian,(i dont know the femine form of that word)(i know there is one, i just dont know how to spell it)she is probably says more funny stuff than any other kid i have been around. she is just a spirit that is laughing most of the time and she likes to be the center of attention. she could care less about being inside, dont get me wrong...there are times when she wants to watch backyardigans, but if she can she is going to be outside! playing, swinging, sliding...picking flowers(dandelions and clover).
i love them both so much! i am blessed beyond anything i could ever deserve...
eric is the oldest, and he is pretty low key. one amazing thing about him is his heart. he always wants to help/befriend the kids who are not the most athletic or the best at whatever it is they are doing. he migrates toward them and says things to me, like...i just wanted them to be in on stuff too dad. how cool is that? he loves video games, the kid would sit in front of the tv playing games all day if i let him. in fact, we have had to limit his play time at that. he gets to play video games on mon, wed, fri and sat.
kinley on the other hand is the comedian,(i dont know the femine form of that word)(i know there is one, i just dont know how to spell it)she is probably says more funny stuff than any other kid i have been around. she is just a spirit that is laughing most of the time and she likes to be the center of attention. she could care less about being inside, dont get me wrong...there are times when she wants to watch backyardigans, but if she can she is going to be outside! playing, swinging, sliding...picking flowers(dandelions and clover).
i love them both so much! i am blessed beyond anything i could ever deserve...
Friday, January 11, 2008
it has been a while
it has...maybe because my last post i was pretty hard on myself or maybe just busy or maybe just lazy??? either way, it has been a while
i wrote that sentence in january of this year! ha..that is funny.
so, lots of new stuff. some good, some bad, some i am not going to share...
i have been in a good place, a funny place...good, but funny. maybe i still am a little bit. i have been struggling with my identity in Christ. a battle between my head and my heart. most of the time i have knowledge of my identity, but sometimes i do not believe it. does that make sense? it is like i know some things about my papa, i was 10 when he died. i know some things about him, although not a ton. he lived about 7 hours away and he was pretty old when i was a kid. he had about 25 grand kids or so, and the only time we got to spend any time with him, about 15-18 other grand kids were there and there was not much if any "quality time" with papa. BUT, i still retain knowledge of him. he liked to widdle* (*sp). maybe you are familiar with this? it is just picking up any ol' stick and taking your pocket knife and carving the stick with your knife.(he was from the south, if you couldn't tell from the ol' and the pocket knife comment...lol) anyway, he liked that. he had a buzz cut...i used to like to rub it, all of the younger grandkids did. so you see, i retain knowledge about him. but i dont, nor did i, know him!
my relationship with Jesus is sometimes like this. i retain info about him, all the while not really knowing him. and the knowledge that i retain is from several years ago...it makes it tough to believe passages like this one...
6It wasn't so long ago that you were mired in that old stagnant life of sin. You let the world, which doesn't know the first thing about living, tell you how to live. You filled your lungs with polluted unbelief, and then exhaled disobedience. We all did it, all of us doing what we felt like doing, when we felt like doing it, all of us in the same boat. It's a wonder God didn't lose his temper and do away with the whole lot of us. Instead, immense in mercy and with an incredible love, he embraced us. He took our sin-dead lives and made us alive in Christ. He did all this on his own, with no help from us! Then he picked us up and set us down in highest heaven in company with Jesus, our Messiah.
good thing He didnt wait on my help to save me, i could have not recognized him or mistaken him. immense with mercy, and an incredible love, he embraced us. hmm...that is amazing! i want in on some of that...
good to be back...
i wrote that sentence in january of this year! ha..that is funny.
so, lots of new stuff. some good, some bad, some i am not going to share...
i have been in a good place, a funny place...good, but funny. maybe i still am a little bit. i have been struggling with my identity in Christ. a battle between my head and my heart. most of the time i have knowledge of my identity, but sometimes i do not believe it. does that make sense? it is like i know some things about my papa, i was 10 when he died. i know some things about him, although not a ton. he lived about 7 hours away and he was pretty old when i was a kid. he had about 25 grand kids or so, and the only time we got to spend any time with him, about 15-18 other grand kids were there and there was not much if any "quality time" with papa. BUT, i still retain knowledge of him. he liked to widdle* (*sp). maybe you are familiar with this? it is just picking up any ol' stick and taking your pocket knife and carving the stick with your knife.(he was from the south, if you couldn't tell from the ol' and the pocket knife comment...lol) anyway, he liked that. he had a buzz cut...i used to like to rub it, all of the younger grandkids did. so you see, i retain knowledge about him. but i dont, nor did i, know him!
my relationship with Jesus is sometimes like this. i retain info about him, all the while not really knowing him. and the knowledge that i retain is from several years ago...it makes it tough to believe passages like this one...
6It wasn't so long ago that you were mired in that old stagnant life of sin. You let the world, which doesn't know the first thing about living, tell you how to live. You filled your lungs with polluted unbelief, and then exhaled disobedience. We all did it, all of us doing what we felt like doing, when we felt like doing it, all of us in the same boat. It's a wonder God didn't lose his temper and do away with the whole lot of us. Instead, immense in mercy and with an incredible love, he embraced us. He took our sin-dead lives and made us alive in Christ. He did all this on his own, with no help from us! Then he picked us up and set us down in highest heaven in company with Jesus, our Messiah.
good thing He didnt wait on my help to save me, i could have not recognized him or mistaken him. immense with mercy, and an incredible love, he embraced us. hmm...that is amazing! i want in on some of that...
good to be back...
Friday, November 16, 2007
who am i kidding?
seriously, are you like me? i have to tell you how i am first, right? i am in broken arrow, oklahoma this morning...i was supposed to be at a plant sometime in the early to mid morning. i wanted to get up and go to a coffee shop early in order to get a cup of coffee and do my devotional. i was running a little late, but i have not been too consistent in spending time with the Lord this week...so i thought it was important so i was going anyway.
new coffee shop...pretty cool place, i get sit down and get comfortable, do my devo and then i am just reading my email and looking at a couple of blogs i read on occasion. i get a phone call...my guy at the customer i am supposed to be at...it is going to be mid morning before they are ready for me. so, i dont really have any plans...and nothing really pressing to do on email, i should be relaxed right?
i'm not...all i am thinking is that these other workers are going to be looking at me and thinking i am just slacking off not doing anything!! i need to do something to look busy!! hurry, i will get a report out of my "man purse" and look like i am busy. even when i am not busy, which is not verry stinkin often, i still feel like i need to be or pretend to be. HOW JACKED UP IS THAT. there are so many things wrong with that statement i would not even know where to start.
somehow, i sometimes base my level of importance on the amount of "busy" in my life. i got issues! the biggest reason i have issues....ok maybe not the biggest, but really big...yesterday i was so very busy!!! and when i talked to my wife, i was so anxious from the overwhelming list of tasks in front of me to do, i was hateful to her. i was hateful to her b/c she asked me to take my son a pair of gloves and a beanie to school...it was cold outside and he did not have any for recess. seriously, what in the world is wrong with me?
new coffee shop...pretty cool place, i get sit down and get comfortable, do my devo and then i am just reading my email and looking at a couple of blogs i read on occasion. i get a phone call...my guy at the customer i am supposed to be at...it is going to be mid morning before they are ready for me. so, i dont really have any plans...and nothing really pressing to do on email, i should be relaxed right?
i'm not...all i am thinking is that these other workers are going to be looking at me and thinking i am just slacking off not doing anything!! i need to do something to look busy!! hurry, i will get a report out of my "man purse" and look like i am busy. even when i am not busy, which is not verry stinkin often, i still feel like i need to be or pretend to be. HOW JACKED UP IS THAT. there are so many things wrong with that statement i would not even know where to start.
somehow, i sometimes base my level of importance on the amount of "busy" in my life. i got issues! the biggest reason i have issues....ok maybe not the biggest, but really big...yesterday i was so very busy!!! and when i talked to my wife, i was so anxious from the overwhelming list of tasks in front of me to do, i was hateful to her. i was hateful to her b/c she asked me to take my son a pair of gloves and a beanie to school...it was cold outside and he did not have any for recess. seriously, what in the world is wrong with me?
Monday, November 5, 2007
questions
i dont know about a faith that provides all the answers to life's mysteries. i need a faith that has more than simple answers to some of life's most complex questions. i need a God that is bigger than anything i can describe, i need a God who is greater than anything i can compare him to, and i need a God is bigger than the questions or answers that i have.
we have been struggling with 4 questions in our student ministry and on the surface they seem like the most basic questions. but when you kindof peel back the layers that they are wrapped in, you will see that they penetrate to the core of who we are or who we claim to be...
they are these...
1) Do you, YOU, believe that God is great? and how great is your God?
2) Do you believe that God's way to live is the best possible way to live?
3) Do you, again YOU, want to be in love with God?
4) Do you really want to live your life with the power of the Holy Spirit leading you everywhere He will lead you to go and living out the holiness that He leads us to live?
good luck with these questions...i hope you struggle with them as we have. they are all tough and they reveal much about us, but as you dig into them they will reveal much about how you view God and this life of following Him. probably for me, the hardest is the last one...i am not for sure that i want to know the explicit will of God for my life.
maybe i will post more about that later...
we have been struggling with 4 questions in our student ministry and on the surface they seem like the most basic questions. but when you kindof peel back the layers that they are wrapped in, you will see that they penetrate to the core of who we are or who we claim to be...
they are these...
1) Do you, YOU, believe that God is great? and how great is your God?
2) Do you believe that God's way to live is the best possible way to live?
3) Do you, again YOU, want to be in love with God?
4) Do you really want to live your life with the power of the Holy Spirit leading you everywhere He will lead you to go and living out the holiness that He leads us to live?
good luck with these questions...i hope you struggle with them as we have. they are all tough and they reveal much about us, but as you dig into them they will reveal much about how you view God and this life of following Him. probably for me, the hardest is the last one...i am not for sure that i want to know the explicit will of God for my life.
maybe i will post more about that later...
Friday, October 26, 2007
crazy times...
i love it all. i do....every emotion, every God given peak and valley. i feel as if i am finally letting go. the tight grip i had on the direction of my life, the control i had over my future...i am realizing that when i let go, God is able to regain the hold on me which He desires. not to confine me, not to hold me back from anything that i might be missing. (Proverbs 9:17-18) in His hands...FREEDOM reigns!!
that sounds so funny coming out of my mouth, a guy that has been leading a student ministry for a time, i have spoken in several churches and different rallies about following Jesus...and i say that now i am finally letting go. but it is the truth, the Lord is revealing great things in my life. lately there has been a conviction in my life, it is this...am i smoking what i am selling? is my life a reflection of Jesus, and how do you do more than talk about following/live for God? Is this me, 2 Corinthians 5:17 . and if it is...why do i look/live so much like my former life?
ok, i am not talking about being a freak or something. going around condemning, beating people over the head with bibles, yelling about hell fire and brimstone....or anything else like that. i am still me, but why do i continue to sin...and the worst part is i tend to think it is ok? and why is there not miraculous things going on in my life like there was in the early church?
there is obviously more than i can answer going on here, but this is what God is teaching me right now. in order for my life to change, to live completely in Jesus...to have this kind of life...john 10:10 . it takes more than me believing in the cross. it takes more than me simply believing in my head that God raised Jesus from the grave and now i get out of hell...ok, so now what?
Jesus says this in John 15:9-12...
As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father's commands and remain in his love. I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.
He, Jesus, wants His joy to be in me AND He wants my joy to be complete. i am assuming that this means more than just happiness...i am assuming that this is a complete kind of thing, kind of like a full life kind of thing. there is an IF on the front end of this statement..."if you obey my commands, ..." so if i obey Jesus' commands, His joy...His complete joy will be in me and my joy will be complete IF...my life, my purpose, my resurected life that i am no longer dead, my new creation life...it will be complete if i obey Jesus' commands. k? so, like obey the 10 commands? dont kill, cheat or lie? dont cuss, drink and smoke? what is the key to this kind of life???? "my command is this: Love each other as I have loved you."
well i might as well just punt...b/c i can not love like Jesus loved. Luke 6:27-36 this is just one way in which Jesus tells how to love! WHAT?? good luck...good luck trying to pull this off!! i am doomed to fail if this is the standard...i will screw this up every time, and i might as well resolve to a crappy life with bills and heart ache and empty dreams. joy is not in the house for daniel!!!
but...biggest word in the bible...but Ephesians 2 ....check out how many "but's" there are in this one chapter that change the landscape of my life!! but God!!! and Jesus says in john 14, that he promises the Counsleor. and he says in john 14:20 that He will be IN us. that word IN changes everything...and i do not understand it, nor fully grasp it...but i am learning how to live according to Jesus IN me. b/c i cant do luke 6:27-36...BUT God can!!!
sorry so long, i am hashing out a message and this helps tremendously...good luck with all this...i will post more later...
that sounds so funny coming out of my mouth, a guy that has been leading a student ministry for a time, i have spoken in several churches and different rallies about following Jesus...and i say that now i am finally letting go. but it is the truth, the Lord is revealing great things in my life. lately there has been a conviction in my life, it is this...am i smoking what i am selling? is my life a reflection of Jesus, and how do you do more than talk about following/live for God? Is this me, 2 Corinthians 5:17 . and if it is...why do i look/live so much like my former life?
ok, i am not talking about being a freak or something. going around condemning, beating people over the head with bibles, yelling about hell fire and brimstone....or anything else like that. i am still me, but why do i continue to sin...and the worst part is i tend to think it is ok? and why is there not miraculous things going on in my life like there was in the early church?
there is obviously more than i can answer going on here, but this is what God is teaching me right now. in order for my life to change, to live completely in Jesus...to have this kind of life...john 10:10 . it takes more than me believing in the cross. it takes more than me simply believing in my head that God raised Jesus from the grave and now i get out of hell...ok, so now what?
Jesus says this in John 15:9-12...
As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father's commands and remain in his love. I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete. My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you.
He, Jesus, wants His joy to be in me AND He wants my joy to be complete. i am assuming that this means more than just happiness...i am assuming that this is a complete kind of thing, kind of like a full life kind of thing. there is an IF on the front end of this statement..."if you obey my commands, ..." so if i obey Jesus' commands, His joy...His complete joy will be in me and my joy will be complete IF...my life, my purpose, my resurected life that i am no longer dead, my new creation life...it will be complete if i obey Jesus' commands. k? so, like obey the 10 commands? dont kill, cheat or lie? dont cuss, drink and smoke? what is the key to this kind of life???? "my command is this: Love each other as I have loved you."
well i might as well just punt...b/c i can not love like Jesus loved. Luke 6:27-36 this is just one way in which Jesus tells how to love! WHAT?? good luck...good luck trying to pull this off!! i am doomed to fail if this is the standard...i will screw this up every time, and i might as well resolve to a crappy life with bills and heart ache and empty dreams. joy is not in the house for daniel!!!
but...biggest word in the bible...but Ephesians 2 ....check out how many "but's" there are in this one chapter that change the landscape of my life!! but God!!! and Jesus says in john 14, that he promises the Counsleor. and he says in john 14:20 that He will be IN us. that word IN changes everything...and i do not understand it, nor fully grasp it...but i am learning how to live according to Jesus IN me. b/c i cant do luke 6:27-36...BUT God can!!!
sorry so long, i am hashing out a message and this helps tremendously...good luck with all this...i will post more later...
Friday, September 28, 2007
well here i am...
i made it! only a little bit behind the curve...but that is the way i roll! today i am bored as could be, so i thought...start a blog. yeah...thats what i will do.
the reason i am bored? i am stuck at the office, my job and my work is not really done at the office. so instead of shopping around on the internet for things i can spend money on, i thought i would put some of my thoughts and rants down on the world wide web!
oh yeah, things i am looking at spending money on...
what i would like it to look like...COOL CORVETTE
thoughts and what not might come later...in the mean time, welcome to my little area on the WWW.
the reason i am bored? i am stuck at the office, my job and my work is not really done at the office. so instead of shopping around on the internet for things i can spend money on, i thought i would put some of my thoughts and rants down on the world wide web!
oh yeah, things i am looking at spending money on...
what i would like it to look like...COOL CORVETTE
thoughts and what not might come later...in the mean time, welcome to my little area on the WWW.
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